Viau’s View

Craigslist. Just saying the name conjures up thoughts of people trying to sell their junk, babies, body parts and other services. It’s a veritable treasure trove of worthless stuff. And a lot of it is incredibly funny. But I think my favorite part of Craigslist would have to be in the romance section where people can search for dates or one night stands. But it’s not just that. They can also search for the ones who may have gotten awaythat is, if there was ever someone there with which to begin.

What I’m referring to, of course, is the missed connections. For those who are unfamiliar, the missed connections section of Craigslist allows people to post an ad about a certain person they may have seen and think they shared a moment with. Please allow me to share an example:

“To the wonderfully beautiful girl stocking shelf’s at good will. You seen me looking at you were wearing a green t-shirt, I walked by you a couple times and couldn’t help my self from staring at you. I would love to spend a little time with you, I think you would enjoy it. I would love to worship you.”

That entire paragraph is taken verbatim from the website. The grammatical mistakes are the poster’s, not mine. At first glance, it’s very funny. But when you start thinking about it, it’s incredibly sad. The odds of the person the original poster is referring to actually reading that post and then responding to it are very slim. And even if the woman in question did happen to see, I like to think she would be more creeped out than anything.

But this is what happens in the digital age. Nothing is actually said to a person. It’s said behind a computer screen.

Because they’re just so entertaining, I’ll post another example. This one from a male looking for a female here in Houghton:

“I passed by your window and saw you reading Baudelaire in the kitchen, wearing nothing but the book, and when you saw me you pulled a face and mouthed “Les veuves, les veuves…” before my friends pulled me away. You look like Claudia Cardinale if Claudia Cardinale were prettier. Respond to this with the name of the cat we’ll rescue, as well as a picture of your handwriting, and I swear I’ll marry you.”

Isn’t that just about the creepiest thing you’ve ever read? I mean, the poster wants the girl to name the cat they’re going to rescue. Unless that’s a reference to Baudelaire, I doubt these two people ever had a conversation about a cat.

When it comes down to it, the missed connections on Craigslist is probably one of the saddest and most pathetic things on the Internetand that’s really saying a lot. I would love to know the statistics of people who actually meet up because of an ad posted. One ad I saw had a picture of the person’s car the poster wanted to meet up with along with the phrase “I KNOW WHERE YOU WORK!!!!!!!!!” I’m not exaggerating on the exclamation points there. Who in their right mind would think this would be the way to someone’s heart (or in most cases, I’m sure, their pants)? The more anonymity a person has, the more they let their crazy stalker side get the best of him or her and with Craigslist, that’s not a good thing. Recently in the news there was the Craigslist killer, who lured women from the Internet and then killed them.

Unless you’re trying to do a legitimate business deal, like sell exercise equipment or buy clothes, Craigslist is not the place to go. However, if you want a good laugh at the lengths people will go to to find someone they believe they shared a mystical, magical moment with, you’ve come to the right place.